Research: Teens Like Parents

Canadian researchers have recently discovered a shocking fact: Teens like their parents! Ok, maybe they don’t like them all the time, and even when they do it’s often hard to tell. But in the latest installment of a Canadian study called Project Teen Canada, researchers found that teens today do in fact have stronger ties to their parents than any group of young people in the past 30 years.

The study, which has spanned 25 years, found that 90% of teens are highly influenced by their mothers and 80% by their fathers. Additionally, teens today report arguing less with parents and they feel more understood by parents than teens from previous decades. The report went on to say that today’s teens also enjoy spending time with their parents much more than teens that were surveyed as recent as the year 2000. So, assuming that Canadian and American teens are pretty much the same except for their chosen pronunciation of a handful of words, chances are that your teens like you more than you liked your mom and dad.

But why the change? Well, according to the researchers in this study, parents today are simply doing a better job focusing on their families. They are reportedly better at balancing work and family life and are spending more time getting to know their teens. This boost in quality time has led to more communication and increased parental influence in the lives of young people.

However, these better relationships may not have translated to better teens. As interaction between parents and teens has reportedly improved over the years, and parental influence has also increased, we as a society are still dealing with huge amounts teen drug and alcohol abuse as well as STD’s and pregnancy. Maybe this is because some of today’s parents are actually spending less time, not more, focusing on their kids. Numerous studies tell us that families are no longer eating meals together, have less face to face interaction, and operate much less as a cohesive unit. Many parents, instead of spending time with teens simply give them what they want and let them do whatever they please. Through this “path of least resistance” approach to parenting, teens and parents are bound to get along because they interact more like friends than parent and child.

However by giving teens what they want, parents aren’t always giving them what they need. It’s important for parents to remember that it’s not your job to give your teen what he wants so he’s happy, nor is it your job to merely enforce rules to keep him safe. The job of a parent is to raise healthy responsible adults and to do that parents must say “No” when they must, “Yes” when they can and most of all parents must strive to spend as much time as possible getting to know their teens.

It is through this time together that your communication with your teen will grow and he will be able to understand that you provide freedom out of trust and boundaries out of love.